blazing trails, part 2

I have noted before that we face challenging times in this hosuehold. A part of that is financial--like many others our income has dropped with only one of us now working. The shuffling around of priorities in spending and shifting of habits demands sacrifices that are obvious and less so. Creative problem solving is helpful, though not always fruitful. I live a lot on hope, and food out of the freezer.

Another of our challenges is familial, and though I refer to it here, it is also personal. Where responding to financial deficits requires practicality, the dynamics of family and the situation at hand usher me into a foreign landscape. There are feelings and behaviors that confront me on a daily basis, and I learned quickly that my life experience, broad and abundant as it has been, did not prepare me for this.

Let's just say that I sought some training to equip me to respond lovingly, supportively and effectively to a new arena of human experience. As part of that effort I also have the opportunity to probe and shine some light on relics of my own, and old, familiar friends from the past are emerging, offering an opportunity for me to take another look from a new and better informed perspective.

I spent some time recently with a friend, during which I worked to redress an old wound. It had not been fully lanced at the time of its occurence and initial tending, and my friend and I both agreed that bringing it into the light now might illuminate other matters of concern.

And so it did. I had the sense that a door long closed to me could now be opened with ease. Stepping through it into the terrain of what awaits on the other side is now a possibility, and there I see the parallel of my path work.

Creating an inner path draws on the same guidelines as an external one: respect for the terrain and what exists there; recognizing which inhabitants are ripe for removal and which are guardians of the landscape; responding to the uniqueness of each portion of the path as it uncovered, and honoring its gifts while proceeding; not losing the opportunity offered by the present moment for the sake of the larger goal of creating a path. And along the way, the awareness that the mysteries of life and love infuse the effort with purpose.

It is not work I would have chosen, but as I begin this journey of inner pioneering I recognize that I come from lineage of pioneers. Pilgrims who set out from Holland to establish a colony at Plymouth; men who argued for liberty and soldiers who fought for its victory; women who worked as missionaries and conquered the barriers of gender to be ordained the same year I was born. The internal effort before me may seem singular in focus, but it is also possible that it may bear fruit that will offer a feast for others. It is my hope that such can be true.

And so I begin. Tools in hand, prayers at the ready, a sense of the landscape and wise and gifted companions along the way.

A way will open, and light will shine forth.

blazing trails, part 1

I've had a path fetish for a long, long time. They call to me, want me to follow where they go, and some part of my being can't resist the opportunity to see where any path will lead. There's something about the mystery of what lies ahead, out of view, around the next corner, at the end...

Many paths, however, are disappointing. There isn't much of interest along its trail, it doesn't weave but a time or two, and the mystery it holds at its conclusion doesn't live up to the anticipation. I have almost come to the point where I believe that the suggestion of the mystery a path may hold is more alluring than the path itself. I find that as tantalizing as the path may appear, I rarely yield any longer to the invitation it offers. Except now and then.

On the other hand, I've got my mind and heart set on a building a path at Melrose. This picture is of one of our views, known as Bampy's View (named for my grandfather). We keep limbs pruned and take down any young whippersnapper that grows up into it and interferes with the clarity of this view. Across the road and down the hill perhaps 100 yards is the road that weaves through the property. In that section of steeped land, winding through the woods and ascending and descending the elevation I want to create a path. The intent of the path is for walking, getting a little exercise without taxing aging bodies and aching joints too much.

I'm also realizing that my desire for the path goes beyond what it will yield upon its completion (which will probably take years!). Forging the path is strongly compelling. I'm not one who enjoys physical labor, so that part I will have to tolerate. But the idea of working in concert with the land and woods, responding to its openings and respecting thicknesses of growth, has enormous appeal. The creation of this path will truly be one of discovering mysteries and encountering surprises. With each section cleared the trees and undergrowth that are revealed will yield the next opportunity or challenge. And like the journey of a labyrinth, each walk along the completed path will be its own encounter with the trail, the woods, and the mysteries that life holds along the way.

I am coming to understand that forging a path, in this literal sense, is also a metaphor for an inner journey. But that is part 2. Today I invite you to see where you are led this day. What paths invite you to traverse them? What challenge lies ahead? What mystery attends you as you make your way?

Blessings to you as you journey.