friday five: pets

Juliet and Dooley on my 50th birthday

At RevGals Jan ruminates about pets. She invites us to "Tell us about the animals in your lives. If you have no pets, give examples of friends' pets or imaginary ones!"


1. Did you grow up with pets?
You betcha! A cocker spaniel when I was a wee thing, and then a cat. When I was eleven my parents gave me a dog for Christmas, and the rest, as they say, is history.

2. Do you have any pets now?
Three dogs (see picture below): Rigel (German Shorthaired Pointer), Juliet (AkitaGgreyhound mix), and McKinlee (Yellow Lab/Jack Russell mix)

3. What is the funniest or worst thing any of your pets have ever done?
I have a terrible memory for antics or stories unless evoked by something, but there is one thing that comes to mind. When my husband and I were dating we were watching TV one evening. My dog, Dooley (seen above on the right) was lying next to Ken and was fussing about something. "GRRRRRRR," he kept going. I finally looked at him and said with conviction, "Dooley, use your indoor voice." He turned his head away and went, "grrrrrr."

4. Who is/was your favorite pet?
I have loved all my dogs equally, but I will say that when Dooley died a couple of years ago from congestive heart failure, the grief was the worst I ever experienced with a pet. I continue to miss him dreadully.

5. How did you train your different pets?
What makes you think I train my pets? Seriously, we don't want to have this conversation.

BONUS: Pictures of a pet or one you wish you could have.

friday five: faith and politics

At RevGals Sally invites us to "think about the mix of faith and politics:"

1. Jesus a political figure: discuss...
By default, he was a political figure. Faith is all about relationship: with God, with ourselves, and with each other. Politics is about power. It's not possible to be in right relationship with God when we aren't in right relationship with others, and that includes being the voice for those who have no access to power. To live faithfully, in my view, means to advocate for the powerless. Matters of social justice cannot help but become political. Such is life.

2. Politics in the pulpit, yes or no and why?
No, not outright. If I am to be pastor to all, then I believe that I need to limit the barriers my parishioners might perceive that could prevent them from coming to me for, or receiving from me, pastoral help. I address political issues by emphasizing portions of scripture in a context that makes them transferable to a political situation.

3.What are your thoughts on the place of prayer in public life...
I have no problem with prayer in public life as long as all faiths feel welcome and included. I have yet to spend enough time thinking about the argument made by atheists that public prayer marginalizes those who don't have a belief system.

4.Is there a political figure, Christian or otherwise that you admire for their integrity?
Barack Obama and Jimmy Carter. And, don't laugh, Henry VIII.

5.What are your thoughts on tactical voting, e.g. would you vote for one individual/party just to keep another individual/ party form gaining power?
I really haven't given much thought to this at all.

Bonus: "O day of peace that dimly shines." I love this hymn. Wish there was more occasion to sing it.
Interesting setting given our topic for today. 
 
O day of peace that dimly shines
through all our hopes and prayers and dreams,
guide us to justice, truth, and love,
delivered from our selfish schemes.
May the swords of hate fall from our hands,
our hearts from envy find release,
till by God's grace our warring world
shall see Christ's promised reign of peace.

Then shall the wolf dwell with the lamb,
nor shall the fierce devour the small;
as beasts and cattle calmly graze,
a little child shall lead them all.
Then enemies shall learn to love,
all creatures find their true accord;
the hope of peace shall be fulfilled,
for all the earth shall know the Lord.

friday five: on the road again

taken from the backseat on a Florida adventure with friends

At RevGals Sophia writes: My family is heading out to my husband's parents for the weekend later today. They would have preferred that we come at Easter, but I preferred that my choir director not bring my life to an early end! (Five liturgies to sing between Thursday and Sunday, two with major solos).

So Low Sunday it is. Some Gals and Pals may have been able to travel to join family or visit a vacation spot last week; some who had to stay put then may be traveling this weekend; and, if I recall correctly, some lucky ones are heading out to the Big Event next weekend. Hence: a road trip Friday Five.


1. When was your last, or will be your next, out of town travel?
In the last nine months our travel has been somewhat wedding focused! Our last trip out of town was to Augusta, GA, for a Christmas shower for our son and his fiance (PS--this is a great idea for a couple who hasn't had much opportunity to collect ornamanets or decorations). Every spring we take a week to go to our family tree farm in SC, just a stone's throw from Augusta, so in another ten days we'll head there, and two weeks from tomorrow is The Wedding! Yeeha! We're looking forward to being at Melrose, and looking forward to the wedding. (Another PS--if you're game, read the preceding post for a little audience participation!)

2. Long car trips: love or loathe?
I actually enjoy long car trips. I love seeing other parts of the country, whether traversing familiar roads (like I-81 in Virginia and PA) or discovering new ones.

3. Do you prefer to be driver or passenger?
I'm happy to do either.

4. If passenger, would you rather pass the time with handwork, conversing, reading, listening to music, or ???
Doing anything that takes my eyes off the road for any length of time is a challenge for me (too many years of getting carsick when I was young). Now that I need to wear glasses for close work (like handwork or reading), I'm pretty much captive to aural and long-range visual interests. When I travel by myself for a distance I really like books on tape. That's how I discovered Stephanie Plum (Janet Evanovich).

5. Are you going, or have you ever gone, on a RevGals BE? Happiest memories of the former, and/or most anticipated pleasures of the latter?
The timing of BE is a bit of an issue for me because it coincides with our annual trips to Melrose. Funds are another matter. I would love to go sometime, however.

6. Bonus: a favorite piece of road trip music.
Willie Nelson's On the Road Again ranks right up there! I like the catchy refrain from Rascal Flatts' Life is a Highway, too!

friday five: planes, trains and automobiles

At RevGals Songbird writes: By the time you're reading this, I'll be en route to a Great Big City to see my son in a play. I'll go by car and bus and train and no doubt cab and maybe even subway. Thus, our Friday Five.

1) What was the mode of transit for your last trip?
That would be the ever-faithful car. I love road trips.

2) Have you ever traveled by train?
I used to take either the train or bus to visit my grandparents in NYC. And of course in the UK, the train is the way to go!

3) Do you live in a place with public transit, and if so, do you use it?
My little town is the terminus of the only public transit rail line to Nashville. I've taken it once. Said little town does not have any other public transportation.

4) What's the most unusual vehicle in which you've ever traveled?
At the time it was unusual, but not so much anymore: a stretch SUV-limo that seated 25 people. It was a Chamber of Commerce event to a celebrity car race at the old Nashville Speedway (Mark Collie, for you country music fans!). Somewhere I have a picture, I'll have to dig it out, scan and post one of these days!

5) What's the next trip you're planning to take?
I'm going on retreat in another week, but I don't really call that a trip. I suppose the next trip in the works will be for our son's wedding in April, to Augusta, GA. We'll combine that with our annual spring visit to Melrose, which is essentially in the metro Augusta area.

Have a wonderful trip, SB!

friday five: dreams

At RevGals Sophia writes: With the beginning of a new calendar year many of us are engaging with dreams of another kind: planning, brainstorming, setting intentions or resolutions, etc… So let's take a few minutes on this (where I am at least) lovely snow-blanketed Friday morning and share about the many different dreams and visions in our lives.

1. Do you tend to daydream?
I wouldn’t call myself a daydreamer, but a possibility-generator (true for my Meyers-Briggs type!). I get ideas and inspiration for things that could be, and sometimes I even act on bringing those possibilities to fruition.

2. Do you usually remember your night dreams? Do you find them symbolic and meaningful or just quirky?
I remember my dreams fairly regularly (like last night, there were these weird snakes…), and if there is something in them that strikes me as significant I am generally able to recall enough of the dream to mull it over for a bit before losing it. My dreams fall into both camps: symbolic and quirky!

3. Have you ever had a life changing dream which you'll never forget?
I wouldn’t say that I’ve ever had a life-changing dream as much as dreams that offered epiphanies that led to changes within my life. Some of them I would describe as opening the eyes of my heart or mind. During one period in my life when I worked for a demon rector, dreams alerted me to the manipulative and cunning side of his personality. That understanding of him led me to a healthier perspective of myself in relation to the church in which I worked. Ultimately it gave me the strength to leave that position for my own well-being before having a call elsewhere.

4. Share a long term dream for one or more aspects of your life and work.
Sigh. I have concluded that I don’t really have dreams for my life. As noted above in #1 I delve more into possibilities than dreams. This might be because I tend to be my own worst enemy when it comes to achieving dreams (or goals). It’s not sabotage so much as a lack of certain skills. Or so I think. I could be very wrong.

5. Share a dream for 2010....How can we support you in prayer on both the short and long term dreams?
More a hope than a dream: our son is getting married in April, and he and his fiancée are struggling to pay for the wedding. It is my hope that we will, somehow, be able to help them financially to ease some of that burden. We have our own financial struggles that make this a challenge, but there are some things I could do to bring in some additional income. I'd also love to lose a bunch of weight by the time that event rolls around! ... Prayer support to help me tackle the fears getting in the way of me doing what I can do to generate more income would be helpful.

Bonus: I wrote this while coming to terms with the end of a relationship long ago.

Reflections on the Memory of a Dream

You were there
like a figure in the mist.
More than a shadow,
the shape was yours.
I felt your presence,
your breath.
I knew it was you.
On the edge of a dream you greeted me,
the warmth of your hand was my
anchor in the mystery that
never unfolded,
but enfolded the harmony of that moment.
Side by side
your shoulder leaned against mine.
"You know, don't you," you said.
"Yes," I said,
"I know."
We watched as a dove soared by,
sweeping to cut an arc
into the mist with its wing.
It disappeared from view,
leaving a flutter of vapor in the funnel
of its wake.
Even in absence there are signs of life.
Your turn to face me,
and I place my fingers against yours,
the pressure of your hands
a gentle tug against my heart.
I watch your fingers fold around mine
and you kiss my hands.
Slowly I step back, the space between us
widening even as the warmth lifts my soul.
I raise my arms and follow the dove into the mist.
You are there. Always there.

friday five: a fresh start

At RevGals Sally writes: As I prepare this post I am aware that it will be posted on New Years Day. We stand at the beginning of 2010 looking not only at a New Year, but at a new decade full of promise and possibilities. For some of us this will be exciting, but others will approach it with trepidation and probably most of us stand on this threshold with a mix of emotions and reactions.It is at this time of year that many (British) Methodist Churches celebrate their Annual Covenant Service, a service that will include this prayer:

I am no longer my own but yours,
Put me to what you will,
rank me with whom you will;
put me to doing,
put me to suffering;
let me be employed for you,
or laid aside for you,
exalted for you,
or brought low for you;
let me be full,
let me be empty,
let me have all things,
let me have nothing:
I freely and wholeheartedly yield all things
to your pleasure and disposal.
And now glorious and blessed God,
Father , Son and Holy Spirit,
you are mine and I am yours.
May it be so forever.
Let this covenant now made on earth
be fulfilled in heaven. AMEN

This prayer is said every year, and offers every member an opportunity to renew their covenant with God. This is no soft or easy prayer, it states in the company of others our willingness to worship God come what may, not that we should become doormats, but that we place God above all else. ( And every year if we are honest we have to acknowledge that we fail).With this prayer in mind I bring you this Friday Five:

1. What will you gladly leave behind in 2009?
The consequences of my husband closing his business. Unnecessary hurt.

2. What is the biggest challenge of 2010 for you?
It looks like I'm going to be the only breadwinner for an indefinite time. My biggest challenge will be meeting that challenge.

3. Is there anything that you simply need to hand to God and say "all will be well, for you are with me"?
Funny, I basically prayed this last night when I went to bed. There are a host of demons in my husbands past that have caused him a lot of hurt. Not addressing those hurts in a healthy way is a catching up with him. I can be a companion and encourager to him in facing that vulnerability and dealing with it but I cannot do it for him. Leaving that to God is very necessary. But oh, I want to help.

4. If you could only achieve one thing in 2010 what would it be?
Reaching the end of the year in better shape than we are beginning it.

5. Post a picture, poem or song that sums up your prayer for the year ahead....
My favorite, favorite poem includes these opening verses:

I said to the Man who stood at the gate of the year,
"Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown."
And he replied, "Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light, and safer than a known way."
Minnie Louise Haskins, made famous by George VI when recited during a Christmas broadcast in 1939

friday five: holy help

At RevGals Sophia writes: It's the last week of the semester here so I offer another very simple Friday Five in honor of the past, present, and eschatological dimensions of this powerful season of the church year....

Please share five ways that God has come to you (your family or friends, your church or workplace, our world) in the past year, that God is coming to you right now, and/or that you are longing and looking for God to come.

This last year has been one that has seriously challenged my coping skills. I’m faced with behaviors of and choices by others than run counter to my norms and experiences, as well as what I have learned, integrated and affirmed about living a healthy life (in all the senses of that word). Even though I have resources for dealing with these challenges I have felt isolated and alone more than is comfortable or consoling. God’s presence has not been overwhelming, nor has it been detectable through the dusk of my days. Like the sun on a cloudy day, however, I do know that God is there. The connection has simply been weak (and we won’t go “there,” just now, to discuss how to interpret that!).

Even so, there have been glimpses of divine presence that have helped me to limp along. Those have been:

1) My goddaughter. She is a source of amazing spiritual wisdom and insight, and has offered guidance and accountability that has helped push me through stagnancy and break into the light.

2) Dreams. One very profound dream contained images of Christ’s life and death and involved a player named Rami whose name, I learned, means “loving.”

3) The icon-writing workshop I took last spring. That was a week of grace and growth spiritually, sacramentally, and creatively.

4) Breath Prayer, offering me a way to include Christ differently in my quest for peace and wholeness.

5) A holy trinity of women are helping me to heal some old wounds that interfere with the health of my marriage. These professionals—a pastoral counselor, nurse practitioner and physical therapist—have opened the door to hope on a path I thought I was traveling alone. Their singular talents are gift enough, but the combined effect of what they offer incarnates salvation. This might just be the greatest gift God has bestowed this year.

friday five: do nothing

At RevGals Sally writes:
I am reading a wonderful little book for Advent it's title: "Do nothing Christmas is Coming!"

So this weeks Friday Five is simple.

List Five things you won't be doing to prepare for Christmas.

1) For the first time in thirty years I won’t be sending a Christmas letter.

2) Because of financial hardship we won’t be buying many presents: just for the kids (two) and grandchildren (2).

3) I won’t be baking cookies.

4) I won’t be making snow angels (this assumes that we don’t get any snow, a 99% accurate assumption)

5) I won’t be drinking eggnog.

And while you are doing nothing play the bonus, put your feet up and listen to your favourite Advent Carol, and post it or a link to it...

Like many, I adore O come, O come Emmanuel, but I have a special fondness for Comfort, comfort ye my people. At the time of a spiritual renewal in my life that led to my baptism, I lived just blocks away from the carillon tower of the chapel at Trinity College in Hartford, CT. I could hear the bells easily, and this is one of the tunes that was played regularly that Advent. Hearing the music evokes that time in my life that was full of spiritual stirring and seeking, as well as other memories of that place and time. It will forever be special to me.



Simple!

friday five: the crush

At RevGals Songbird invites our hearts to go pitty-patty on the subject of crushes. It's been awhile since my memory went down that lane!

1) Did you ever have a crush on a teacher?
Yes. He was my high school English teacher (junior year). He was good-looking, of course, but he was also kind, attentive (in the listening sense), and had a gentle manner. I also remember that his brother played for the New Orleans Saints. Way back when!

2) Who was your first crush?
Close to home, I honestly couldn't tell you. But in the celebrity world there was Bobby Sherman and Donny Osmond. Donny gets pooh-poohed a lot, but after seeing him on Dancing with the Stars I stand ready to affirm that my instincts were right about him. He's a decent, down to earth guy with a great sense of humor.

3) Have you ever given a gift to a crush?
Does throwing a set of love beads to Bobby Sherman on stage count?

4) Do you have a celebrity crush? (Around my house we call them TV boyfriends and girlfriends...)
Ah, now you're talking.
In the acting world: Richard Gere, way back when, but now he's so last year. I enjoy regular doses of Mark Harmon, and especially love the sheepish little smile that masks the affection he has for his team on NCIS. Deeper down, Tom Skerritt is my man. Ever since Picket Fences. The description of his looks as rugged come closer to reality as he ages, but I still find my heart skipping a beat when I see him (even when he plays a rogue).
In the music industry: Ty Herndon (country). Just watch his Steam video and tell me he's not hot.

5) Have you ever been surprised to find yourself the crushee?

A time or two, and sadly, the crusher was of no interest to me. Ah, such is life and love.

friday five: thinking about thanksgiving

At Revgals Jan writes:

The Cure

Lying around all day
with some strange new deep blue
weekend funk, I'm not really asleep
when my sister calls
to say she's just hung up
from talking with Aunt Bertha
who is 89 and ill but managing
to take care of Uncle Frank
who is completely bed ridden.
Aunt Bert says
it's snowing there in Arkansas
on Catfish Lane, and she hasn't been
able to walk out to their mailbox.
She's been suffering
from a bad case of the mulleygrubs.
The cure for the mulleygrubs,
she tells my sister,
is to get up and bake a cake.
If that doesn't do it, put on a red dress.

--Ginger Andrews (from Hurricane Sisters)

So this Friday before Thanksgiving, think about Aunt Bert and how she'll celebrate Thanksgiving! And how about YOU?

1. What is your cure for the "mulleygrubs"?

Not a cure, exactly, but as a means to get moving I pick one task that will offer the satisfaction of having completed something. Making the bed always works. After that I can usually do another task. The best sustained therapy is to create something.

2. Where will you be for Thanksgiving?
We’ve been invited to join the family of some friends, so we will be there for dinner, but otherwise home doing who knows what.

3. What foods will be served? Which are traditional for your family?
I have no idea what foods will be served where we are dining. Growing up we had the usual fare, except that I didn’t like potatoes, so there was always a rice dish. For several years I made a pumpkin roll for dessert that continues to be a favorite.

4. How do you feel about Thanksgiving as a holiday?
Love the four day weekend, hated the traffic back when I would drive to my Mom’s (I haven’t lived in the same area for 15 years). I was always glad to be with my family. We usually had others join us, which changed up the dynamic a bit. Playing charades was standard after-dinner fare. Since moving elsewhere I’ve pretty much been an orphan at Thanksgiving, so the experience is different from what it was.

5. In this season of Thanksgiving, what are you grateful for?

I’ve been feeling pretty beaten up lately, so right now I would have to say that I am grateful that I have the strength of inner resources to get me through. God is a huge part of that, as are other faithful people who have been companions on this rocky stretch of journey.

friday five: moments of our lives

At RevGals Sophia ruminates about a pending event, and writes: "This has me thinking of the special rites of passage in our lives which we participate for ourselves or in which we support and bless others: baptism, confirmation, marriage, ordination, graduation, funerals, etc. Such important days, so exciting and joyous, but also sometimes anxiety provoking or deeply painful....So, this week, please share five memories of such sacred moments with God and her holy people from your life and the lives of those you love."

I'm going to do this in chronological order, just because

1) One of the most profound privileges of a sacramental ministry occurs during periods of vulnerability in a person's or family's life. The death of a loved one, particularly, invites poignant sharing and the opportunity for extraordinary ministry. I have come to treasure these moments spent with the dying and members of their families, and in compassionate tending while others have grieved. These are sacred times of deep love, and an opportunity to offer, according to God's mercy, that divine peace that passes all understanding. This columbarium holds the remains of some for whom I cared, who from their labors rest.

2) One day my dearest friend called me with great excitement in her voice. "We're going to be grandmothers!" she burst out with the news of her daughter's pregnancy. My relationship with Kathy and her family was wonderfully integrated, and I was folded into her clan with generous hospitality by all of them. I enjoyed easy relationships with her mother, brothers and extended family, and had an especially close relationship with her daughter, Carrie. And so a grandmother (with a small g) was born.

A year after Katie was born I baptized her. It was a joyous time, and offered the opportunity for a technological first: one set of godparents were in Virginia, but we put them on speaker phone via a cell phone and they participated in the promises and vows by voice. I can't put my hands on the pictures from that day, but I did put together a hastily assembled scrapbook page of the event. I love the picture of Katie reaching/pointing toward the flame of the altar candle, and saw in that gesture what became the title of the page: reaching for the light.

3) Ken's son, Kenneth, Jr., is like a son to me. His father is retired army, 82nd Airborne and then some. Growing up Junior was eager to follow in his father's footsteps, kicked up a notch. Four summers ago he graduated from Ranger school and became a full-fledge Army Ranger. It was a dream fulfilled for him, and a moment of pride for those of us who love him. Junior is now in the National Guard after completing six tours to Iraq and Afghanistan as a Ranger.

4) Our wedding! I waited a long time to be married (I was 48!). We actually had two weddings: a civil ceremony (conducted by the state's supreme court justice, and an Episcopalian!), and then a blessing of our marriage several months later where we could do the church thing and have everyone there (except Junior, dang it all, who was off learning how to escape and evade). This is my favorite picture of us from that day.

5) The birth of Luke, our first grandchild. Luke was eight days when we first met him. This picture of Ken kissing Luke's forehead is one of my favorites of those few days we spent getting acquainted. We saw Luke again when he was six weeks old and haven't seen him since. He will be two in November. A difficult relationship between father and daughter took a painful twist after that last time with Luke, and it remains to be seen, still, how it will be resolved, if it will be resolved. Grandchild number two is about to enter the world and we don't even know if we'll learn of his or her arrival.

Even without any real relationship with Luke, his arrival in the world tagged me as Nana. In spite of the pain of not being able to live into that role, it is a role nonetheless. It is agonizing to fall in love with a child and then be parted from him and all news of him. But I hold him in my heart and remember the few precious days of holding him and cooing over him and falling in love with him.