friday five: smile, smile, smile!

For this week's ff Jan writes: what makes you smile? Remembering that Meister Eckhart said that if you pray "thank you" that that is enough of a prayer, share with us five things, memories, or activities that bring you smiles and gratitude.

Too many good memories from which to choose, so...

Very simply, after days and days of rain, we have sunshine today! Big ol' smile!

I got a lot done last night around the house. We've been doing a little remodeling, and the remnants are still present just about everywhere (we are still working on the punch list). I unpacked boxes of books, put things away that had taken over surface areas, cleaned the kitchen, and so on. It's almost a whole new house this morning!

I have some shipping supplies left over from a time when I had an online craft business. Thistle Farms (I live about 30 miles from its location) has just let me know that they would be glad to have them. I'm freeing up even more space in my house and doing a good deed in the process. Yippee!!

I tried online shipping last night for the first time, and am thrilled not to have to make a trip to the post office, and I saved money (you pay less, which I didn't know).

Spent an hour and a half on the phone the other day with my best friend from seminary. Tonic for my soul, it was. It had been too long since we had talked, and the joy of that exchange is inspiring me to get on the phone with my friends more often.

A bonus, "feel good" story to share. The mother of my phone conversation friend died a few years ago, and Carolyn shared with me that her mom's last words, surrounded by her family, were, "my cup runneth over." Apparently this was a popular phrase with Carolyn's mom, so much so that the letters MCRO were embroidered on a pillow for her. That story elicits a spontaneous smile when I think about it.

for all the amazing women I know

This is a beautiful story. It is inspiring me to spend today reaching out to the women in my life that I know are amazing. God bless you all.

make new friends and keep the old

I've known Anna for a few years. Been acquainted is a more accurate description. She was doing youth ministry in the diocese for a few years and our paths would cross at diocesan events and here and there on other occasions. She's now developing a business as a professional photographer (does great work), and we "friended" one another on facebook a while back. It is through the latter that I've caught other glimpses of her, and through her blog I've seen still other sides of her. Over time and with intention we made the social networking-assisted transition from acquaintances to friends.

Last fall she was seeking volunteers to work on a particular photo project, and I volunteered. Between our complicated calendars we're still trying to work out a date to do the photographic work, but in the meantime we also concluded that it would be fun just to get together and get better acquainted. Yesterday was that day.

She and her husband built a house last year and she invited me there for coffee. She made scones, pictured above. Melt-in-your-mouth-savor-every-bite scones. We sat in her kitchen filled with the profuse gray light of an overcast day and talked. Two hours passed with lots of animated conversation ranging from gardens, to photography (surprise!), misbehaving dogs and housecleaning products (yes, there's a connection there), baking and bishops and things in between.

It was tonic for me. In spite of a dreary day littered with snowflakes and messy windshields, I got out of the house. I drove over the river and through the woods and rolling hills to the house of a friend and left the usual behind. I got to see, hear, taste and touch someone else's world, look out their windows and realign my sight.

It's good to have friends, old and new. It's especially good when they make fabulous scones.

friday five: social networking

Kathryn at RevGals writes: I had the joy of spending time with Songbird last weekend, someone I would have never met had it not been for the blogosphere. Now we keep in touch using a large variety of methods: blog (hers a lot, mine not so much lately), facebook, twitter, text messaging, chat and email. So far there has been no skype.It got me to thinking of the pros and cons of these relatively new means of communication and interconnecting and so I ask you the following:

1) What have been the benefits for you of social networking (blog, twitter, facebook, etc...)

My first experience of connecting online was through a scrapbook message board in 2002. It was a difficult and isolating time in my life and I began posting to this board for help while putting together a scrapbook for a friend. A community of early morning posters formed, and through format changes on message boards, and the creation and demise of others, this group still continues to be in community with each other. I have met most of them "in real life," and all of them have been anchors in my life at one time or another. Three of them came to my wedding several years ago (pictured with me, above--another scrapping friend is in the top right photo).The ongoing contact we have means more to me than I think I can ever express to them all.

Through the Anglican/Episcopal discussion board on Beliefnet I met one of my dearest friends, Jayne, and through her I met my husband! That's Jayne above, top left, and I think you can figure out which picture is of my spouse! It was also Jayne who pointed me to RefGals and a few other bloggers I follow, so I owe her a huge debt for connecting me to people who have become staples of my day and enrich my life in more ways than I can count.

I love facebook. I have reconnected with friends from high school, college, seminary and other phases of life. Maybe best of all it has afforded me the opportunity to get acquainted with some of my husband's extended family, and that has proved a Godsend. 

I won't venture into the benefits of blogging, because I think we all know about that!

I don't twitter. I can barely keep up with the above! And I use my phone to talk to people--I don't do tech through that channel.

2) Which medium do you use the most? Or if you use them all, for what do you use each of them?

I blog almost daily, and use facebook throughout the day. The former is a way to share photos and news with family and friends, and now and then offers a place to express thoughts or share quandaries. Facebook serves a variety of purposes, but is perhaps most valuable when I'm stuck on something and need the expertise of others (especially as it pertains to technical matters). Almost always there's someone who has a helpful response that saves the day.

3) If you could invent a networking site (with no limits on your imagination), what would it provide? What would it not provide?

 I haven't a clue. That's a feat for those gifted with that kind of imagination.

4) Who have you met that you would not have met if it were not for the 'miracle' of social networking?

The most noteworthy, as mentioned above, is my husband. But there are also friends who are lifelines for me and help keep me sane, and the collective community of those friends are invaluable.

5) Who do you secretly pray does not one day try to 'friend/follow' you?

I don't think there is anyone in my life who falls into that category. Should it happen, however, I'll let you know!

BONUS: What was the most random/weird/unsettling/wonderful connection you made that would not have happened if it were not for the ease of which we can find each other in the computer realm?

There are many happy connections and reconnections that have transpired. One significant new connection came through Jan of RevGals, who commended a blog through which I found another blog, through which I began sewing again and rediscovered my inner quilter. Amen to that! There have also been some fun "small world" connections to discover!

color me rich

The other day while playing in Picasa I received an "alert" that a new version was available. Did I want to update? So update I did. There are a variety of new features on the latest version, the most notable of which is that it has a facial recognition feature. Yowza! This feels like big time, like scanning crime data bases to identify an un-sub, LOL. It's been sort of fun to see how many pictures there are of the people in my life (and sad to recognize how many duplicates I've got floating around on this computer taking up precious space on my hard drive!)

In honor of those folks--family and friends--whose images bring smiles to my face and whose presence in my life light up my days, I've done a collage of a few of the players. I love this feature of Picasa. Its only shortcoming is that I'm not able to arrange where the pictures go. For instance I had to click on the "shuffle pictures" button a whole bunch of times before the picture of my Mom wasn't a tiny square.

Anyway, this is a mere beginning. If you're not in the collage please don't take it personally! I limited myself to a small number so that the images wouldn't be tiny. All of you bring light and love to my life. I am a blessed woman!

I'd like to introduce...

I have some amazing friends, one of whom is Nancy Rue. Nancy was a parishioner several years ago, and despite the boundary issues that challenge clergy relationships, we became close friends. When a series of events a few years back left me homeless for several weeks, Nancy and her husband took me in and gave me refuge. They nursed my spirit, provided comfort, and as ever in their presence we laughed and enjoyed the close camaraderie of friendship. Nancy and Jim rank up there at the top of my list of favorite people.

Life circumstances and directions have resulted in not seeing much of each other since my return to the Cedar City, but one of the comforts of friendship is knowing that the friend is there when you need them. The other day when I was feeling particularly blue and alone, Nancy was the friend I turned to. Yesterday we spent a delicious chunk of time together over tea laced with conversation. I was able to pour out my heart, and she listened faithfully and attentively, offering exactly what I needed. I was able to cry, to laugh, to speculate, throw up my hands at the bewildering mysteries and challenges of life, and have my heart soothed and comforted. That time together was a precious gift to me, and I am abundantly thankful for the honor of her friendship.

I mention her here today, however, not to extol the virtue of her friendship, but to brag on her! Nancy is a writer whose published work began with young adult books and expanded in recent years to include adult fiction. She teaches at writing conferences and participates in workshops that serve the needs of home-schooling families, among a variety of other groups. Her focus is grounded in her Christian faith and through her work she invites others to engage and practice their faith through the daily toils and traumas (and celebrations) that are common, especially, to growing up female. Nancy is one of the best-kept secrets of the Christian publishing world, and I share this today to do my small part to expose those who are a part of my world to the joys of her work. It's not mentioned on her web site, but her novel Healing Waters was selected as the 2009 "Women of Faith" novel of the year!

One of the things that makes Nancy so popular among her readers is that she isn't preachy, and she writes to reach people where they live and run into the foibles of life. She is particularly gifted working with 'tweens, and she engages with them directly through a blog on her web site, as well at conferences and workshops. If you're looking for reading material for a young or approaching adolescence girl, Nancy is a great choice. She's also a rare "moderate" voice in the Zondervan publishing world, who won't compromise her views to please the publisher.

You go, girl!

Reporting live from the Florida coast...

good food, good friends, good times, and then...

One of the fun things about holidays is the opportunity to entertain with a certain amount of flair. Halloween isn't generally a holiday that tempts me to entertain, but Clare's visit has inspired some thinking outside of my usual box. Saturday morning we hosted a Silpada jewelry party brunch, and I had great fun searching out recipes to underscore the occasion. Among them were the deviled eggs, already appropriately named, decorated with black olive spiders. Then there were the cheddar witches fingers, and the pumpkin cheese ball (click on photo to enlarge for a better look).

Rounding out the spread was baked curried fruit, pumpkin french toast with maple syrup (OMG, soooo good!), honey ham and some necessary chocolate. For libations: coffee, orange juice with or without enhancement by either vodka or champagne, and a special cocktail of a fruit juice blend, vodka and grenadine. The abundance of marigolds came from our garden, thriving in their boxes after all the rain. We had a lovely group of women who had an equally nice time perusing jewelry for purchase, and vittels for the soul. It was a great morning.

Alas, there isn't a picture of the adventure that started the morning: the lock to the bathroom got set accidentally, and since we close the bathroom door when not in use to get a certain puppy from grabbing hold of the toilet paper roll and rendering it useless, we were thus locked out! Not a pretty situation when the women in the house were in need of and desiring morning "refreshing." Ken tried a variety of lock-picking techniques to get us out of the jam, and just shy of busting the door down so that we could get in he decided to try to get the window open from the outside. He succeeded at that, but then there was the matter of someone climbing through the window to get to the door. Alas, yours truly was the candidate, and that was an interesting task (it is not a large window). I did, however, persevere, and we were able to breathe sighs of relief and generally proceed with the day.

In the afternoon we gathered up in costume to head to MJ and Cheryl's for the Florida-Georgia football game. In order to expose Clare to some regional feasting Ken prepared a low-country boil, and in keeping with that effort he adorned himself accordingly. I think he gets the award for originality. Look closely to note the "Skewered Cajun Chef." When I noted that he was sporting a vegetarian kebab he was quick to point out that a meatball was in the middle of the vegetables. Witty man.

We were all quite happy that the Gators won handily (though Ken and I felt some sympathy for Trisha, who is loyal to Georgia), and once we returned home Clare headed to facebook and joined the "Go Gators" group.

Before sharing the next bit of news let me just say how blessed I am to have such wonderful people in my life as those with whom I spent this day. Ken, Clare, the women who came for "juice and jewels," as one person alluded, and the Gator Gang. It was a joy-filled day that was soul-satisfying and nurturing, and reminds me of who I am.

Alas, once home we suffered a mortal blow to the heart when we opened an email from Ken's daughter announcing the birth of their second child (another boy)--ten days earlier. Our names were the last in the list of those to whom the email was addressed. There are no words to describe the pain of this gesture on her part, which is at the least intentional and cruel.

The timing of my getaway to Florida Sunday afternoon could not be better, though I am not happy that Ken will be alone to process and react to the latest action in this family's drama. He'll be okay, but it would be better for us to have the opportunity to share our thoughts and feelings together as we experience them. I guess I can take down the sign over the kitchen door that reads, "Nana's kitchen: where memories are made and grandkids are spoiled. Open 24 hours." Prayers for wisdom and tenderness, and eventually for healing would be appreciated. I feel too torn within to pray myself.

It had been such a lovely day, and the good news is that those memories will stay with me and affirm what is so good in our life. I just wish that life didn't suck so much as to clobber them so unnecessarily.

Channeling Julian: all will be well...

friday five: lifesavers!

Kathryn at RevGals reminisces about a cruise experience and looks ahead to one with the Gals (I sooo wanna go!), and asks, “… dramatic or fairly common – what have been/are your lifesavers (If it helps, try the phrase 'life giving' instead.):

1) Your lifesaving food/beverage.
Morning coffee. Savoring that perfect blend of brew, sweetness (just a touch) and half and half (more than just a touch), brings me into the moment and draws me away from the lists forming in my head.

2) Your lifesaving article of clothing.
jammies

3) Your lifesaving movie/book/tv show/music.
The West Wing. Loved the characters, and the education in the politics of politics was outstanding (to quote Josh). For music, almost anything Celtic, Bach’s Brandenburg Concertos, and a lot of baroque music.

4) Your lifesaving friend.
Different friends give life according to various needs. But two groups of friends stand out for distinct reasons. 1) My “castle-hopping” friends, made on a dancing tour of Scottish Castles 20 years ago. An amazing bond formed among several of us on that trip. Whether it was the dancing, the laughter, the sheep or the scotch, we became thick as thieves. I went through some very difficult times in the years that immediately followed that trip, and they kept me on my feet, even from a distance. Another group is the “Cabana Crew,” a group of scrapbooking friends met online. Being with them is tonic to my soul, full of laughter, fun, spontaneity, laughter, good food, laughter, shopping, laughter… you get the idea. Being with “the Crew” is good for whatever ails me. My friend Clare (who arrives tonight!!!) and I head to Florida tomorrow afternoon to be with some of them for a week. The contented sigh you will hear over the next several days will be coming from me.

5) Your lifesaving moment.
When I realized that marrying my first betrothed would be a huge mistake. Even though the decision to break the engagement had very difficult consequences for me (homeless and unemployed!), picking my way through the debris of that decision yielded a better result than going through with the marriage would have. I came upon a quote shortly after making that decision, and though it doesn’t yet apply to my life, it calls me forward into what I hope my life will one day reflect: “I have woven a parachute out of everything broken.” (William Stafford).

respite

Much as I am committed to the care and nurture of the pups, my endurance is fading. The last time I did this I had the support of Ken and, for several days, Junior and Trisha. It was a shared labor of love. It continues to be a labor of love and a routine has developed that removes a layer of stress. But it is difficult to manage the rest of life (e.g. the other dogs!) and the tasks of my days with a sense that I am doing anything well. By the way, that's Boris to the right. Is he cute or what?

Blessedly I was invited to join some friends last night for dinner. I timed the feedings to bookend my social engagement, which worked well, and it was an evening without stress and a delight to be with friends and eat too much wonderful food. Yolande made me a dazzling gin and tonic offered in a pilsner glass--how's that for a change of pace? My host, Linda, made "roasted tacos," using a beef roast rolled in small corn tortillas and fried (like a tacquito). Lettuce and cheese were available to pile on, and Linda's homemade salsa crowned the taco. Yum! We also enjoyed spanish rice, delicious beans, and a black bean/corn/tomato/onion and cilantro salsa salad topped with avocado. Double Yum! For me there was no such thing as dessert, and I was home and dependent upon a few burps (sorry if that's tmi) before I began to feel relief from my indulgence. It was a superb meal. The change of scenery and the socialiability of the evening proved restorative, and I came home feeling good and with spirits refreshed.

In the sort of timing that one can only laugh about, I was just starting to feed the pups when I went to the door to let in Juliet and Rigel from their little bit of relief. I was greeted immediately with a whiff of skunk, and Juliet was nowhere to be seen. Doggone it! I called and called. No response. I could have gotten in the car and driven through the neighborhood, but in the dark it would be difficult to spot her. I had to trust that she would behave as on occasions past, and respond to the sound of my voice calling her name as I belted it out into the night. I had squealing puppies to feed.

I prayed as I fed, and four puppies later I noted Juliet's shadow outside the door. Thank you, God! I brought her in immediately, and indeed, she had been sprayed. Fortunately it was not as potent a spray as in previous encounters, but she would still need to be bathed. Sigh. Deep sigh! Time to practice mindfulness, and breathe.

A bath later, I was more than ready for bed. I slept fitfully, and this morning the routine begins again, with the addition of cleaning the bathroom and doing additional loads of laundry. I do love my life. Really. I'd just rather do without the skunks. As long as they're around, however, just keep those gin and tonics coming.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

I am feeling obliged to weigh in on the Obama school address. Can I just say, "what is with you people?" The resistance is beyond ridiculous, and the behavior speaks volumes about ugly traits that reveal some serious immaturity in this country, never mind racism, bigotry, and the very partisanship of which Obama is being unjustly accused. Indoctrination? Please. This is the President of the United States. Consider the weight of the office and the respect due to it if nothing else. Let his voice be heard. If there is something problematic in it then a teachable moment is available to every student and parent to talk about the issue at hand. Show courtesy, respect, and yes, patriotism. If this was G. W. B. (and I don't mean the bridge), not my favorite politican by a long stretch, I think I would actually feel proud of him for stepping up to the plate to say something of value. My very own county is citing a "scheduling conflict" as the reason for not showing the address. Pathetic, cowardly, small-minded, and intentional ignorance are a few of the epithets that come to mind. Get a grip, people!

Okay, I am now off my rant. I'm proud of you, President Obama!

disclaimer and apology

It can be dangerous to single people out for recognition. Leading up to my "J" post I was aware that, with my hit-or-miss mid-life memory I would inadvertently leave someone out (which I did). I also knew that to use that post to talk about particular people in my life would open the door for some to wonder about their inclusion in posts, alphabet or no alphabet. The other day when I listed some of the people who inspire me I didn't include my friend Jayne (who is a major inspiration in many ways) and kicked myself for that. The balm for my error was that I knew she would be in the next day's post, and if she felt overlooked (and I'm not saying that she did or suggesting that she might have!), the next post would, I hope, alleviate any sense of feeling slighted.

I don't get myself in a wad stressing over hurt feelings, but I am very much aware of occasions that can lead to that. I've had my feelings hurt plenty of times when I wasn't included in something, inadvertently or by design, so I know how these things go. So let me say here and now to those who read this blog, please don't take it personally if you don't appear in a post, and don't read anything into those occasions when a post might include you, by virtue of its topic, but doesn't. There is no intended slight.

I do, this morning, owe an apology to my friend Jimmy for leaving him out of the Js this week. That list included people with whom I have regular contact (I know plenty more Js!) and with whom I have shared some particularly trying times. Each of them have demonstrated above and beyond friendship in one way or another, and it was through that lens, with help to my addled brain from my cell phone directory, that the J list was generated. Alas, Jimmy isn't in my cell phone (that will be rectified shortly!). Lots of people aren't in my cell phone directory because I'm not a big fan of cell phones, but I digress.

Jimmy (along with his wife, Barbara) is at the top of my list of favorite people in the world. He is a Melrosian, the term I devised some years ago to refer to people who love and have a connection to Melrose, just to offer a context. Self-less (he would chuckle at that), generous, thoughtful (he would chuckle at that, too) are just a few words to describe him. Jimmy is one of those people who remembers the events and people in your life and inquires about their wellbeing because he knows they matter to you. He's a gentleman (he is snorting now) with a disarming sense of humor and a genuine compassion for others. He has a great smile and wonderful laugh, cooks amazing meals and tends a stocked-for-you bar. His politics lean clearly in one direction, but he keeps an open mind, takes the time to listen to and consider the points of views of others, and is a model of what it means to be in respectful disagreement. His hospitality is unrivaled. He is a delightful friend.

And now, crap, I've just remembered someone else who should be on this list (again, not in my cell phone directory!), but I will desist and move on. I am grateful for all the people in my life, those who've known me since my birth and those whom I've come to know through this blog and other online forums. Each of you enrich my life in ways unique to who you are, and for the abundance you bring to my life I cannot thank God enough. Bless you, and may your day be glorious.

jumpin' jehosophat! part 1

it's "J" day! I've been waiting for this day. It turns out, you see, that there are a lot of "J" people in my life, and I'm not talkin' Meyers-Briggs (although there are those kind of Js, too!). What fun, today, to pay tribute to them! I wish I could write at length about each of them and do justice to the places they hold in my heart, but for purposes of this blog I will try, at the least, to tip my hat in some meaningful way. It turns out that it takes a fair amount of time to do this, so I have broken up my "J" list into two parts.

Let's start with the J gratitude list:

Jesus * Jobs * Justice * Jam * Jokes * Joy * Journeys * Journals * Jewelry * Jigsaw puzzles

and move on to (in alphabetical order) the first part of the Js:

Jamie, my brother: he's a bit of an enigma, a private person who holds more talent in his little finger than one might imagine is possible in a person. He's incredibly creative in a number of arenas: art, music, design, cooking, writing. He's a remodeling contractor whose work is distinctive and original. LOVE his stuff! He is quietly passionate about his work, his family, his world. He reads and studies and integrates what he learns and experiences. Sort of a renaissance man. I admire him a lot, and wish we were closer.

Janet, or Scrapping Janet, as she is known to Ken: Janet is a W: a wise, witty, welcoming woman who doubles as my personal assistant when I'm on a road trip. Before we had a GPS in the car Janet was our GPS by phone. Just one example: on our way to the Outer Banks for a wedding I realized that I needed an item to complete a gift. I got Janet on the phone, she went online and found the nearest Michael's to us as we were traveling through North Carolina, and gave us directions. Mission Accomplished (and I didn't have to wear a jump suit to proclaim it so!). One of the things I love about Janet is that she is there when I need her. Not just for directions to places, but to offer a hug, a listening ear, a funny thing to say to lift my spirits, or simply to hear her voice on the other end of the phone when I'm feeling alone. She is constant, hesed, to use a biblical word. My rock of a friend. And she sends me flowers when I'm really in a funk!

Janet, my spiritual director: wise, compassionate, understanding, affirming, encouraging. (She says "hi," Danielle, and congrats!). She is a really good fit for me, for my reverently irreverent, seeking spirit, and a gentle soul.

Jayne, yenta and so much more!: You'.ve heard about Jayne before on this blog. Dear, dear friend who introduced me to my husband, but that is just one thing that I love about her. Many of my friends are thoughtful. One of the ways that Jayne is thoughtful is that she sends me books! When I was stumbling through putting up a web site she sent me HTML for Dummies. Bingo! She has sent novels that she thinks I will enjoy, or other aids to some aspect of life where I am feeling the need of some literary support. She's insightful, caring, tells the truth, makes me laugh, and shares with me a slightly twisted theology. No, that's not right, but I'm not sure quite how to describe it. Let's just say we push the boundaries a lot, but we are firmly grounded in the heart of God. (Feel free to correct me, Jayne!). I really wish she lived closer, though she is always available in a crisis by phone or email.

Jesse, my nephew: I feel blessed to have what I consider a special relationship with Jesse. Before moving away from where my family lives I saw him pretty regularly, but even with less frequent visits subsequently I think it's safe to say we are close. When he was almost four (he is now a rising college sophomore), I was dealing with a very difficult time in my life. I was on the phone with his mother, and Jesse heard only her side of the conversation as she and I talked. After a while she said to me, "Want to talk to Jesse?" He came to the phone, and the first words out of his mouth were, "tell me your problem." Hear those words in a four-year old's voice! He is long on compassion.

Jenny, like a daughter: Silly, irreverent (hmm, there's a theme here), loveable and loving. Jenny is the younger daughter of friends from my home parish in Connecticut, and sister of my goddaughter Johanna. For several years when the girls were young I had the privilege of sharing lots of fun times with them. We shared church activities, but what was most special is that I got to borrow them to exercise my Mom gene. We went to craft fairs, pizza parlors, Christmas exhibits, movies. They came to my house for sleepovers, to bake cookies, play with the dogs, and in general just be kids. Jenny liked to push the buttons on the microwave as though she were imparting a secret message. She didn't then, nor does she now, suffer fools. She is a free spirit who values authenticity, too often has learned the hard way, and like one of those blow-up punching bags for kids that have sand in the bottom, she rights herself and carries on. She is now gaining on 30 and we aren't in touch often, but our love for each other runs deep and has staying power.

Part two tomorrow. In the meantime, here are some of today's Js. Left to right: Janet, Jesse, Jamie, (sister-in-law Barbara), Jayne and Jenny.

it's a wonderful (online) world

My online life began seven years ago when I discovered a message board (MB) sponsored by a scrapbook magazine. I was unemployed at the time, recovering from the trauma of a broken engagement (my choice), and relationally isolated. I was working on a scrapbook for my friend Kathy, a record of our trip to California the year before, and in need of guidance related to a particular task I wanted to accomplish, I turned to the MB.

Life changed. I made some of my best friends through that experience, and though the MB is no longer there the friendships continue to thrive through blogs, facebook, and other MB's that have come to life. Best of all, many of us have met in person and several of us manage to get together as often as possible to enjoy each other's company "in real life."

Through another MB I met my friend Jayne, and through Jayne I met my husband. It was also Jayne who directed me to the RevGals blog, and through that blog I have connected with other kindred spirits and found sustenance for my soul. The network that comes to life through this online medium is an astounding thing.

Several years ago when the scrapbook MB was still active my friend Janet began a daily alphabetic post of gratitudes. It was fun to see what things people appreciated in their lives, and I made a copy of the final A-Z list to keep for future reference. I decided to put together my own scrapbook album of gratitude, alphabetically organized, and began work on it. I managed to finish the "b" page, and one of these days will get back to that album.

This morning Jayne posted about kindness, inspired by another friend's post who made a reference to gratitude, and I got to thinking again about my list. Life has changed since I first compiled my gratitude list, and there are new things to add. This blog offers a new way to share them. So in the days to come, interspersed with other posts, I will work my way through the alphabet once again, mindful of the many blessings that decorate my life, some big and some small. It is a wonderful world.

how do you solve a problem like McKinlee?

I've lived through many a puppyhood. I've endured the fascination with shoes and slippers, snatching socks, housebreaking, and chewing through just about anything in their path. But McKinlee has brought a new challenge to the fore: she is eating the couch. The new couch. The not-yet-a-year-old-and-not-at-all-cheap couch. The corner of the cushion where Ken sits. The minute she is alone with the couch it is hers.

This poses several problems that probably don't need to be elaborated here. I'm more interested in solutions. The ones that occur to me are:

1) Training. This goes without saying, and she needs it anyway. I know myself--I can and will do some, but I'm not sure I have the self-discipline to impose it on her accordingly. My mother will bear this out as a truth.

2) Confinement. Ouch. She's a social dog and isolation makes her sad. Me too.

3) Attach her to my person at all times when we're home so that she isn't left alone unsupervised.

4) ? (I had a thought a moment ago and it has evaporated. Such a reflection of the state of my mind these days...)

I'm leaning toward #3. She tends to follow me around anyway, it's just when she gets bored that she gets into trouble. It will also mandate some training and will no doubt aid the housebreaking. How to attach the leash to me is another matter, but I'm resourceful. Ideas? I'm open to suggestions.

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I'm doing a long-distance wave to my Mom who is at Tanglewood this weekend with some friends (that's the summer home of the Boston Symphony, in the Berkshires of western Mass. Beautiful place). They've been going every year for so long that I can't remember. Back in the day some of them would ride their bikes from Hartford (the drive takes about 90 minutes) and camp out through the weekend. Now the group is rather gray, some have died, others are battling serious illness. But they're troopers, every one of them. Have a great weekend guys! Hope the weather holds!

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I'm also doing the long-distance wave to some friends who are in North Carolina for a girls weekend (is "girls" possessive in this use? I'm never sure...). I can imagine the fun and hoopla--wish I could join you!

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In other news I finally got our taxes done. We learned Tuesday that they had to be filed before Ken could take care of something, so the rush was on. It's not my best work, but the important thing is that they are done. I'm crossing my fingers that we won't owe anything, because then I'd probably be calling on my friend Maria to find bail money. And I'm already organizing this year's material so that next year I don't face such an overwhelming task.

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And finally. One of the joys of summer in the south is the crepe myrtle. Once it blooms (late June) it's glory shines until the cooling days of fall (think October). The blossoms are profuse and showy. I love the deep lavendar and rich fuscia colors, and can stare out the window at our neighbor's tree and sink in its beauty. We'd love to plant some in our own yard, but it's hard to find a place where there isn't rock when you dig down more than 3". In the meantime I enjoy the color in the neighborhood and the view from our windows.

Have a glorious weekend.

friday five: friends

Jan at Revgals writes:
Ever since I found out I could be the hostess for the third Friday Five of each month, I have not been able to get the thought of friends out of my mind. Being an only child (all growed up) who moved around a lot in my lifetime, friends have always been very important to me. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote: "The way to have a friend is to be a friend."So today let's write about the different kinds of friends we have, like childhood friends, lost friends, tennis friends, work friends, and the list goes on. List 5 different types of friends you have had in your life and what they were/are like.

I am blessed to have some amazing friends, and I am especially blessed that they put up with my less-than-stellar care of them sometimes. (So many things in my life need rehabilitation...)

Among my blessings are:

Cross-generation friends--

Jimmy and Barbara were friends of my grandmother, then my Mom, and for a good number of years now friends of mine as well. They have a unique place in my family's life, but the blessing is that beyond being family friends, I count them as personal friends as well. They are fun, witty, smart, compassionate, generous, selfless, hospitable, and the list goes on. I wish we lived closer, but at least I get to see them a couple of times at year.

Young friends--

This is Sammy, who fits the description "If I had a daughter of my own I would want her to be Sammy." Along with Johanna, my goddaughter, I have received the gift of being able to exercise the Mom gene with my young friends. They have come for sleepovers. I have attended their school functions. I have sewn for them, knitted for them, cooked for them, taken them shopping, listened to them, loved them. And more. They have no idea how incredibly important it has been for me to have them as "daughters." No idea. I'm crying as I write...

Cyber friends--

My life is so rich with wonderful cyber friends. These relationships began through a scrapbooking message board, then others came through beliefnet, and now via the blog world. A cyberfriend in New Zealand is my confessor (she's a non-believing RC, perfect choice!) and my twin in so many ways. Others help me exercise my funny bone because they help me laugh, and laugh, and laugh some more. Others offer hugs and send flowers when I'm going through a rough patch (well, they all offer hugs, some have the "send flowers" gene). Still others inspire me with their creativity, and others live such amazing lives and rise to challenges that would leave me in a heap that they have my undying admiration and respect. And they're smart. I like smart. And creative. Did I mention that? And witty. Those three attributes top my list.

Local friends--

For a transplant like me this is a very important category! They're the ones with whom I go eat sushi, hold yard sales, call in emergencies, call just because (and it helps to know their schedule!), and who bail me out when I haven't yet recognized that I need bailing. They conspire to throw me birthday parties (thanks Yolande!) and pay attention to details that emerge at birthday parties (that would be you, Wendi, even though you don't read this). These friends ground me in a different way than some of my down-deep, there-in-the-crux friends. Couldn't do without 'em!

Through thick and thin friends--

There are fewer of these, and they hold a place of honor that I revere. They not only listen to me whine, but they catch my tears, scrape me off the floor, soar through the air with me, understand with silence too deep for words, emerge when I didn't know I needed them... Some are near and some are far, but when push comes to shove, they come through like no one else. They are heart heroes to me.




Okay I'm crying now, and I have a funeral this morning and still need to print bulletins, get dressed, figure out what I'm going to say... I want to ask my revgal friends if they vest when doing funeral home services. Do you? I'm not going to. (Wish there was a quick and easy way to be in touch when these things come up!). No bonus link today, but I want to give a nod to Kim and Diane as new cyber friends who help keep me centered. And I learned of them through the revgals!

Thanks for giving me some time for my inner being as I start my day. My soul needs my friends. I love you all!