Here are some decisions that changed my life.
3) The decision to marry (the first time). I was 45, and this was a long-awaited dream come true. It was magical and adventurous and the manner in which it all unfolded was, for me, outside the box. Choosing to marry a man who lived in another state meant closing down shop where I lived. Sold my house. Resigned my position. I was packed and getting ready to move when it became clear that the marriage would be a mistake. 4) The decision not to marry. Oh, the consequences! See number three above. There were, of course, family and friends who already had plane tickets, deposits had been paid, the dress hung in my closet... But for me there was no place to live, no job… I was homeless for three weeks, the dogs were boarded, and the kindness of friends and the company of their cat kept me sheltered, fed and comforted. I was unemployed for 13 months, a period of time that served as a crucible for debt, doubt, and desperation.
5) The decision to marry. This was a good choice, and nearly three years later I am still adjusting. There is too much to say about how much marriage alters one's life. I am grateful to have a husband with whom I can be myself (even when it annoys him), and a life together in which we both desire the best for each other, and seek to help the other reach our personal and collective goals. We have our trials, and we have the grace that our love for each other runs deep and sustains us when the terrain is challenging.