Wednesday, October 13, 2010

working toward normal

I know there's really no such thing as normal. There are things that may be normative--for me, personally, or for the culture at large--but normal is really what you make it.

It occurs to me this morning that I am a miserable failure these days at making normal.

Take this pumpkin. The dog is normal in my life (and isn't he/she just the sweetest thing?), but I can't remember the last time I bought a pumpkin, never mind bought one and carved it. A normal thing to do this time of year. A seasonal thing to do. An American thing to do, no matter your race, creed, or the color of your eyes.

My Mama raised me better than this. It's not that we made a big deal out of carving pumpkins when I was a child--Halloween was not a big deal for Mom in the decorating and go-all-out department--it's just something that came with the seasonal territory.

Of late I, we (as in Ken and I), don't take advantage of seasonal opportunities to get out into the world and play and participate and, well, be normal. I'm lamenting that. We have ruts. And when an occasion pops up to burst free of the rut we make noises about doing so and then, nothing. What is wrong with us? Aside from the fact that whatever we do needs to cost nothing, what is holding us back? When did we become fuddy-duddies?

I know it's the wrong season, but I think we need to declare our independence from the doldrums. Or at least I do. Somehow or other I need to generate the steam that can gather into momentum and propel me forward into doing and not just being. I'm pretty good at being, flaws notwithstanding.

The floor is now open to suggestions of things to consider doing in the coming weeks and months that will help break this stubborn mold of same old, same old. I'll start by suggesting that we go out and get a pumpkin.


The Bug said...

You're asking the wrong folks - Dr. Linthead & I are TERRIBLE about getting out & doing things. We say when we visit a beautiful spot: let's come back for every season. Not! And we don't like people so we don't go to festivals. But I do find that if there's something I want to do if I put it on the calendar it MIGHT happen. You just have to be intentional.

Mary Beth said...

Wow. My sweetie and I are having the same conversation. We are utter duds when it comes to doing things. We really want to change that. (I didn't even put up a Christmas tree last year until two days before...ugh.)

He likes to ride his motorcycle and I would like to ride with him IF I got the thingy to modify the seat. Time to make that happen. And, to get a pumpkin. :) thanks.

KimQuiltz said...

The X and I had become horrible fuddy duddies, so I know what you are talking about. Now that I am single and my JOB is to get out and go and see and do (as the weekend reporter), I am having a BALL.

One weekend I'm at Oktoberfest and Apple Harvest Fest, another weekend a church dedication and a fundraising pie auction, this weekend I'm probably going to the Roller Derby.

Now I know that is a bit too much for people to do normally unless they are getting paid to do it! But! The key to doing something new, I think, is to go into it without expectations of what you are going to get out of it. Make it an adventure of discovery. Don't worry about joining in as much, take the pressure off yourself to have a great time, enjoy learning and watching what other people are into. You'll "catch" their joy and excitement, I guarantee.

Amy said...

Thanks for the reminder. No pumpkins yet but we are venturing into the desert for 3 nights next week in Nevada. It's flannel sheets weather and we're looking forward to being totally away from any and everything civilized!

Jayne said...

Part of my personality is that I adore having things to look forward to, and yet, like many people, we too, get in that rut of day to day existence here. That's one reason I was so keen on getting those Elton John tickets. That was a pretty easy commitment to make by purchasing them on-line, and now I have something upcoming to really be excited about. We never go to community shows or festivals either as K hates the crowds, and who wants to go by themselves? Sigh... in the same boat with you in many ways.

Mompriest said...

What I like about pumpkins is I don't actually have to carve it for it to be decorative. A couple of pumpkins in different sizes and a basket of mums make their own fall statement. And while you are picking out pumpkins grab a bag of apples and make a pie....and just enjoy being outside. I get myself out several times a week to walk the dogs - dog park is my preference - and always people there to socialize with, or not.

But mostly my husband and I are homebodies. Always have been. sigh...


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